Saturday, February 6, 2010

Traffic Jam Session

Personally, I am hoping that in the next life we don't have traffic. It seems that if we can travel just by thinking ourselves somewhere, like some of the near death experience survivors claim, then traffic must be a telestial world problem. Even more of a reason to strive for the Celestial Kingdom, don't you think?

I wonder if I can make it to the CK without mastering my issues with traffic, though. I had this thought one day that turned into a full blown scenario, maybe even a vision, though nothing like the tree of life vision, or anything like that. I saw myself going before the pearly gates after this life was over, expecting to be let in, but being told that there was this one little area that I hadn't quite taken care of, but not to worry, because I'd be given another chance there. The problem was that I was still impatient in traffic and I had to get that under control. I was shown the time that I was driving along with my just-learning-to-talk twins in the back seat when someone cut me off in traffic. I said "Helloooooo!" at the closed window in a not too quiet tone, and few seconds later from the back seat I heard, "heh-wooooo!" in exactly the same inflection that I had just said it. I made a note to myself to try not to say ornery things out loud when the kids are in the car. Then I remembered the time that I had picked my daughter up from high school with the other children in the car. As we were driving out of the neighborhood, some teenagers jay-walked in front of our car and stopped in the middle of the street and did a dance right there, I suppose for our enjoyment. I rolled down the window and told them they were idiots, whereupon my oldest daughter immediately turned around and said to her siblings, "Don't do what Mom does." Oops. Or there was the time that I was coming home at midnight after returning the videos that were due, being followed by a big truck with his brights shining in my rear view mirror. I slowed down just to pay him back and he had to follow me that way for quite awhile. As I was making a left hand turn onto my street, I didn't realized that he had had enough and was passing me on the left side, crossing over the double yellow line. I didn't check my mirrors, and as I made the turn, he plowed into my car, pushing me out of the way, and kept on driving. When I realized that I seemed to be okay, I took off after him to get his driver's license. He pulled over after a block or two and luckily didn't kill me. It turned into an ugly mess, but once again brought home to me that I had better learn to behave myself.
In this scenario, I was told that I had to attend traffic school, but since they don't have traffic in Heaven, I'd have to take it in Hell, and it would be a lot harder to be nice about it there, because everyone really would be out to get me, as opposed to how I imagined it being in this life. After thinking about that, I decided that maybe I ought to try to do better, just in case there was something to it.

I think I am doing better, though some days are definitely better than others. I saw an interesting phenomenon one day while driving. I realized after awhile that I had been on auto pilot, while my mind had been somewhere far, far away. When I came to, I realized that for the longest time, all the cars in the group I was in had been traveling at exactly the same speed, with no one weaving in and out of traffic. It was as if we were all connected by steel beams so we had to stay the exact distance from one another. Finally, I realized what was going on: There was a policeman just ahead of us and no one wanted to pass him. I thought how funny that was, but also realized what a pleasant, unstressed experience that drive had been, feeling in no rush to be any where and not having to worry about getting around the traffic. I learned something that day: To enjoy traveling in the car, go the speed limit, and let everyone else who is in a hurry be the ones to weave in and out of traffic, and go around me if they want to. I now have 3 traffic rules, that I try to follow if I want to reduce my stress in that area of my life.

1) Leave in plenty of time to get where I'm going, with a little time to spare. If worried about having too much time, take a book to use up the extra.
2) If traffic is moving slower than I would like, listen to some good music (make sure to take my own, so I don't spend all my time switching radio stations) to make it more enjoyable.
3) As was mentioned before, stay in the slow lane and let everyone else be in a hurry.
4) Realize that my negative reactions to how others drive are choices I make, and that I am just as capable of choosing not to react negatively to them. If I feel an adrenaline rush coming on, I can just take a deep breath, let it go, and find something more positive to think about.
At the end of the journey, I'll either be stressed or calm. It's my choice. What a concept!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

For those who may spend a lot of time STOPPED in traffic, might I recommend a bottle of bubbles? It could reduce your stress as well as that of the drivers around you.

Melody said...

I LOVE it! I'm definitely going to get bubbles for me and the kids and keep them in the car. Oh, wait, they ALWAYS spill bubbles. Ok, just for me, then. :) Thanks for the great idea!