Continue in Patience

The following are my thoughts on Elder Uchtdorf's talk entitled "Continue in Patience," which he gave in the April 2010 Priesthood session of General Conference. I realized as I read it that the concept of patience is an easy one for me to ignore as one of the things that I should be consistently working on. I think the reason is that when the temper flares up, it also subsides rather quickly and life just moves on. It is apparent, though, that the weakness of impatience continues to plague me, and in reading his talk I decided that it was time to get the hitch out of my giddyup and start working on it with a more concerted effort. The following is a compilation of the quotes I pulled directly from that talk along with my commentary, in the hopes that actually writing them down in the process of pondering them will help me to remember longer. His quotes are in black, and mine are in my color. :)

Elder Uchtdorf said that "without patience, we cannot please God; we cannot become perfect." Ouch! I want to please God and I certainly do want to become perfect, and if I want those things enough, it appears that I need to work harder on cultivating this virtue. One thing I have learned, I hope, is that I will not be perfect in this life. That will happen in the next life through the mercy and atonement of the Savior. Knowing that, I do not need to go around mentally beating up on myself for my weakness in this area. However, if I do want to eventually receive those blessings, then improvement needs to be a constant goal toward which I am working.

"Indeed, patience is a purifying process that refines understanding, deepens happiness, focuses action, and offers hope for peace." What beautiful promises these are! Could I not trade my impatience for those things? I feel like I have an attention problem and it never occurred to me that exerting more effort in the area of patience might help with that. It would certainly be worth a try.

"But children are not the only ones who spoil when showered with immediate gratification. Our Heavenly Father knows what good parents come to understand over time: if children are ever going to mature and reach their potential, they must learn to wait." Hmmm, am I spoiled? Yes, I think I am. I pretty much get whatever I want. I keep hoping my husband will put his foot down and rein me in, but it sort of looks like that won't happen, so I guess it's going to have to be up to me. Add "self-control" to the list along with patience.

". . . I learned that patience was far more than simply waiting for something to happen—patience required actively working toward worthwhile goals and not getting discouraged when results didn’t appear instantly or without effort." I find it easy to get discouraged sometimes when things don't go the way I want them to. Part of my problem, I think, is putting too much emphasis in what I want to happen as the outcome of different circumstances, but I also find that the times when I'm able to let go of expectations and just accept the things that come, I can stay peaceful, realizing that there is only so much that I can control.

"Impatience, on the other hand, is a symptom of selfishness. It is a trait of the self-absorbed. It arises from the all-too-prevalent condition called “center of the universe” syndrome, which leads people to believe that the world revolves around them and that all others are just supporting cast in the grand theater of mortality in which only they have the starring role." Ohh, that hurts a little. I guess that harks back to the spoiled child syndrome above. I find that I tend to get impatient when people bother me when I'm on the computer, or when I'm trying to concentrate on something, and they won't let me finish a thought. I guess that's the problem: I'm never doing "nothing." Even when I'm sitting and it looks like I'm doing nothing, I'm probably just trying to think a complete thought, and the inability to be able to do so is probably the cause of my attention deficit issues. It's starting to feel like there is a lot of interconnectedness going on here.

In these next quotes, Elder Uchtdorf is particularly addressing his remarks to the priesthood holders. In order to apply them to myself, I've taken the liberty to change a few words in order to liken his remarks to me. My changes are in brackets.

“No power or influence can or ought to be maintained by virtue of [our callings as wives or mothers], only by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned.”^{2
Basically, this says to me that we cannot have a lasting influence over people if we use compulsion and impatience as our way of controlling them. They might do what we want, but they won't respect us and we won't have a positive influence for good if we use unrighteous methods in our interactions with people.}

"The character traits and practices described in these verses are the foundation of godly patience and are inseparably connected to effective [godly womanhood] and [m]atriarchal service. These attributes will give you strength and wisdom in magnifying your callings, in preaching the gospel, in fellowshipping [Relief Society sisters], and in giving the most important [selfless] service—which is indeed the loving service within the walls of your own homes.Who wouldn't want that kind of help?

Let us always remember that one of the reasons God has entrusted [us with the callings inherent to women] is to help prepare us for eternal blessings by refining our natures through the patience which [selfless] service requires. I have to admit that my nature could certainly use some refining.

As the Lord is patient with us, let us be patient with those we serve. Understand that they, like us, are imperfect. They, like us, make mistakes. They, like us, want others to give them the benefit of the doubt.

Never give up on anyone. And that includes not giving up on yourself." So it would appear that patience is much more that controlling one's temper, it is the key, or at least on of them, to unlocking the powers of heaven. I guess that would make sense, because in any moment that I am feeling impatient, the Spirit is not with me, and I am unable to draw on the heavenly assistance I might need. Wow. That would be a good thing to keep in mind.

"We must learn that in the Lord’s plan, our understanding comes “line upon line, precept upon precept.”⁶ In short, knowledge and understanding come at the price of patience." Yes, we must allow Heavenly Father to dictate the timetable of life's events." Rephrasing: Patience is the price I must pay for knowledge and understanding. Without patience, I won't be able to increase in those areas.

"Often the deep valleys of our present will be understood only by looking back on them from the mountains of our future experience. Often we can’t see the Lord’s hand in our lives until long after trials have passed. Often the most difficult times of our lives are essential building blocks that form the foundation of our character and pave the way to future opportunity, understanding, and happiness." This brings up the little thing that lots of people say, "Let go and let God," realizing that things are happening according to His wisdom and timing. Life does go so much more smoothly when I do that, it makes me wonder why it's so easy to forget it.

Patience is a process of perfection. The Savior Himself said that in your patience you possess your souls.¹¹ Or, to use another translation of the Greek text, in your patience you win mastery of your souls.¹² Okay, so by applying patience, the issue of self-control might come along naturally. Two for the price of one! All right!

Patience means to abide in faith, knowing that sometimes it is in the waiting rather than in the receiving that we grow the most. This was true in the time of the Savior. It is true in our time as well, for we are commanded in these latter days to “continue in patience until ye are perfected.”¹³ That's such a good thing to remember: Sometimes it is in the waiting that we grow the most.

"To paraphrase the Psalmist of old, if we wait patiently for the Lord, He will incline unto us. He will hear our cries. He will bring us out of a horrible pit and set our feet upon a solid rock. He will put a new song in our mouths, and we will praise our God. Many around us will see it, and they will trust in the Lord."¹⁴

Sometimes our trials are given to us so that others may be strengthened by watching how we continue to patiently wait on the Lord during our trials. I've thought a lot about how I can be strengthened by my trials, but not so much about the idea that my going through them might be strengthening others in the process. That is an interesting idea to ponder, because it might appear that someone who is able to cheerfully bear all things, has already learned their lessons in those areas, and thus wouldn't need to continue to suffer, but who knows that part of their life plan, agreed to before they came here, was to suffer so that others might come to God through them. They, in essence, become a type of savior for those people, and they will be called blessed in the next life because of it.

"My dear brethren [and sisters], the work of patience boils down to this: keep the commandments; trust in God, our Heavenly Father; serve Him with meekness and Christlike love; exercise faith and hope in the Savior; and never give up. The lessons we learn from patience will cultivate our character, lift our lives, and heighten our happiness. They will help us to become worthy [women of God] and faithful disciples of our Master, Jesus Christ."

In summary, lessons to be learned from patience are:

Patience = working while waiting, and not being discouraged in the waiting.
Impatience = selfishness.
Patience = effective service.
Patience = faith; the waiting might be the lesson.
We must learn to wait if we are to reach our potential.

Blessings that come from Patience:

We can please God and become perfect.
Refined understanding.
Deepened happiness.
Focused attention.
Strength and wisdom in magnifying our callings, in preaching the gospel, in fellowshipping and in giving the loving service within the walls of our own homes.
Refining of our nature.
Increased knowledge and understanding.
The Lord will incline to us and hear our cries.
We will praise the Lord.
Others will see us and come unto Christ.
Heightened happiness.
We will become worthy and faithful disciples of our Lord Jesus Christ.

It will be worth the effort!